Lately my spies have been telling me that there is a rumor going around that I am engaging in what you Humans call a business arrangment with the Human known as the Creator, the friend of those out to lunch scientists aboard Ghost.
My instincts are telling me that this rumor is coming from Billy Bob Bubba who doesn't seem to have anything else to do besides restore a 1956 Cadillac convertable. How could anyone think for a minute that I Ming the Merciless, Emperor of all the Universe, before whom all intelligent life forms must grovel appropriately, would associate with one of you primitve creatures, especially the single biggest pain in my glutei maximei.
Everyone knows that this Creator is the most sarcastic Human on your planet and the idea of me going into business with him in order to sell the vapomatic 1600 franchises is nauseatingly obsurd. I mean, death by vending machine? Come on!
Although, ....... now that I think about it, the prospect of thousands of you Humans stepping into a vaporizing booth everyday is appealing and would tend to move things closer to my Light Speed Corridor project. Hum!
But let me make this perfectly clear! I wouldn't associate my illustrious self with one of you dysfunctional hon-yocks.
Your Benevolent Emperor
Ming
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